You Can't Always Get What You Want

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Hi readers!

Some big news here on the blog - I went and had myself a baby girl!

There’s been a little less content around here while I learned the ins and outs of having a beautiful newborn baby, but I’m excited to be back, writing to you all and coaching clients again.

You can imagine there’s been some hefty lessons that have come with this time in my life. I’ve been mentally storing them up to share with you readers, in the hopes that they’ll help you in a relevant area of your life too.

So - let’s start with how we try to control outcomes.

Over the years I’ve become pretty great at this.

Sure, I’ve been frustrated with the time it takes to tone up at the gym, but over a series of months I’ve always got there. At work, the promotion might not be available straight away but I keep plugging away and when it’s there, I’ve often been the chosen one.

You can imagine my surprise over the last couple of months when I discovered no matter what action I was taking I couldn’t control a certain result.

I have had some nursing issues (who the hell hasn’t I’ve discovered) and I took it on as a project - I researched all I could, went to appointments, stocked up on supplements and medicine, started my regime with full gusto and was ready for the results to start rolling in…

...then three weeks later… nothing.

Since I was told results should come after two weeks, I was confused. This isn’t what happens to me.

Cue a yucky spiral of sadness, doubt and defeat.

But then I realised… feeling crappy about it was only having one effect. Making me feel like crap.

It seemed I couldn’t change the circumstances, but I could change how I felt about them.

I have been loving being a mum but feeling down doesn’t leave much time to smell the roses and enjoy the moment.

After much thinking, I decided to mentally LET GO OF THE OUTCOME (gasp).

I realised even if I hung on tight to the outcome I wanted, it would still have no effect, so it was time to stop the suffering.

I now feel about a billion times better. Sure, I feel a bit disappointed, but it is what it is. I am trying my best, but sometimes in life that just won’t do the trick.

Can you change your thoughts about something that’s getting you down?

Can you let go of an outcome and, in doing so, let go of some suffering?

I hope you can and feel the relief I’ve finally come to.

Mwah! 

An Easy Visualisation Technique to Deal with Negative People

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Earlier this year, I was having trouble with a particular person in my life - I would call him an ‘energy vampire’...

I wasn’t super close to him but had to have a lot to do with him on a week to week basis. In my eyes, he was very negative about life and I felt like I was a sounding board for much of this negativity.

Plodding along through everyday life, I thought the relationship wasn’t having much of an effect on me. I knew how our conversations would go and I would nod and sympathise, then move on with my days.

However at a session with my kinesiologist, the relationship came up as a big red flag in our discussions. Despite the nodding and smiling, underneath I was feeling incredibly drained and exhausted by the relationship and it was bringing me down.

My kinesiologist suggested a great technique that I used around this person from then on and I’ve shared it with clients who are in similar situations.

Whether you’re feeling drained by family, a work colleague or friend, this visualisation technique is designed to protect you from any negative energy while still allowing you to be there for people as needed.

You can do these steps before you speak to them next or during your conversation.

Picture your bubble

This will be different for all of us, but if you picture a bubble around yourself when in conversation with this person, what does it look like?

What is it made out of? Is it wet or dry? What colour is it? Is it round or does it run close to your body?

Let the bubble protect you

Once you have a clear picture of the bubble around you, you can start to imagine it as a sort of shield in conversation with this person.

As the other person speaks, you are protected by the bubble.

Do you see their words bouncing off the bubble? Do their sentences drip down the side? Does the bubble reflect their words back to them?

You can still concentrate on what they’re saying but in the back of your mind, visualise and know you are protected by the bubble.

Repeat

The key is to use this visualisation technique to protect your own energy as needed.

Without the bubble, it’s quite easy to absorb what someone’s saying, feel down about their struggles and leave situations with them feeling depleted.

Using the bubble lets you still hear them out, be there for them, but you know you are protected from any negative words or energy and can move back into your day without your vibe being brought down.

Let me know if you try the bubble technique with someone in your life. How did it work for you?